Saturday, 24 October 2009

First winter

This is my first winter with asthma and I'm wondering what to expect. On the whole, this diagnosis of asthma has made little difference to my day to day living. Just occasionally will catch me out on a long uphill walk or if someone is brushing the dust from paving slabs in the garden. Cough cough. 

Last two nights, I've been unable to sleep with an odd feeling. Not tight chested like an elephants been sitting there, but more a light feeling like a butterfly has landed and beat its wings. Maybe its just me. Anyway last night despite trying all the counting and rhyming games that usually make me drop off again - it just wasn't happening. 

Downstairs for thimble of milk (how come when you want a glass of milk, there's just enough left in the carton for breakfast), couple of Pringles, three grapes - sour(!) - memo to self stop buying 'basic range' fruit in supermarket, desultory reading of book. Looked around room...i-Pod on table. How silly. How could I forget that's what I tell everyone else to do when they can't sleep?

Back upstairs, earphones in place. Wild Theme from Local Hero on repeat and next thing I knew it was 9.30 with building site over the fence in full flow.

But its a funny thing this having asthma at first. You don't know whether to blame for sleepless nights or not. Funny butterfly trembly feelings or not. Previous to the diagnosis, yes, I've had both. So is it just me, normal, or just that I may have had asthma before but only now have it confirmed.


Tuesday, 20 October 2009

Splat whilst on holiday..

So my record attempt at staying out of hospital came to an end whilst on holiday in scotland.
Its that time of year when everyones coughing and sneezing and usually around september I get a cold which leads to an inevitale hosp stay. I didnt get one so kinda hoped I'd avoided it but nope 2 days in to my holiday I come down with one.
I have had 2 this year that have not gone to my chest (much.) now we know this is down to the subcut keeping lungs happy. So I was kinda hoping the same thing would happen. It didnt stop me quietly worrying that I was gonna have an attack but you cant say, yep think im gonna splat in a few days, people would think I was mad!
It hit me hard though and within two days I was in ITU in a strange hospital struggling lots and trying to avoid being ventilated, I came very close eeek.
I was in itu for 5 days as I was having issues with being hypoxic, now this is new for me as usually on the right 02 my blood gases settle within 24 hours. Nope on 15l my gases were still not good. They put me on a machine called a vapotherm, heated and humidified 02 via special nasal prongs! 25l on that and nope still not good add in another 10ls via mask, wow thats alot of 02! So this continued for a few days and I had a CT scan to check for a PE. All clear apart from infection, I just needed a bit of time methinks as after 6 days things started to settle and from then on thanks to 100mg of pred, iv antibiotics and all the other usual ivs I picked up quite quick. After 12 days I home, and a few days later after a 7 and a half hour car journey I'm home home.

So now I'm nearly back to my normal kinda. Have just started an open uni course which I'm loving so thats keeping me busy.

Clarebear :)

Friday, 9 October 2009

Pick yourself up and give yourself a good shake

Recently i have been really down with my asthma and it has been getting to me. I have now decided that the more i am down the worse it will feel. So i have decided to get up give myself a good old shake and get back on with life.
My asthma is totally unhappy and not good at all, i am getting breathless all the time and coughing lots, i am limited by what i can do physically but i am now determind not to let it get me down. I have been ringing my poor resp nurse every day this week. They have increased my medication today and have said there is not a great deal that can be done until the frost comes along and kills the fungal spores so roll on the first frost i am waiting for you. Mean while i cannot stop my life and hide till it comes i have to get on with my life!

I have decided that i am going to spend my time doing the things i enjoy even if i have to do them slowly, so today i went to a coffee shop for my lunch. Later i plan to decorate some candles that i am making for my friends christmas presents. Tomorrow i am planning to go into town to get a few items.

I guess at times when your asthma is controlling you, you have to take hold of it and say no, i am going to controll you! It is hard work and takes lots of determination especially when you know your next attack could land you back in hospital but it must be done. Get out and enjoy your life even with asthma.